Posts Tagged ‘misophonia’
Tinnitus March 27th, 2008
Currently my tinnitus has decided its going on the rampage.
About 48 hours ago, I started to get increased awareness that there was this constant ringing behind my left ear that now is at the point where I cant switch off from it. Ultimately this affects my mood [Ive been very stressed and tense] and I cannot hear properly. At work today, I was getting terrible headaches and my eyesight was affected by this as well - I couldnt focus very well or quickly on things.
I have been reading Pawel Jastreboff’s book on tinnitus retraining therapy but its a bit of a slow read and I havent yet reached the section on how to ‘retrain’ my hearing. You can read his writings online at either http://www.tinnitus-pjj.com/ or http://tinnitus.org
Upon reading, I also found that I have misophonia or a ‘dislike of certain sounds’ [initially I thought it was hyperacusis but that is where all sounds are over pronounced].
The sounds that I dislike are things like PA announcements [hard to avoid when I travel by train to work and encounter them on the train as well as on the platform], the bleeps that signify that doors are closing, any kind of chiming sound like doorbells, lift sounds, etc. I am especially in pain from emergency services sirens, which again are hard to avoid living in London!
I am going to take the day off work tomorrow to go to my doctors to get an appointment with an audiologist to try and get some professional TRT as well as work on stuff on my own.
This has effected making music and my concentration with pretty much everything - I was incredibly stressed and short with some people today at work where I can usually bite my tongue. I cant seem to focus on making any music and Im feeling nauseous.
This creates tension in me which makes me clench my teeth,and my shoulders so my body is physically tense and creates a cycle so that the tinnitus becomes more pronounced, which in turn adds to the stress, physical tension and then the tinnitus.
I can understand how some people get so stressed that they contemplate suicide.
I can trace all the root of this back to one stupid incident in which an old flatmate thought it would be funny to make me jump by creeping into my room, whilst I was intensely focused on coding a website, and hit a saucepan with a wooden spoon. The sound resonated through my head and this is why the tinnitus is more pronounced in my left ear.
I always had a level of tinnitus before that through abusing my hearing with listening to loud music in clubs but it would die away to an unnoticeable level after a day or two but no it is always present and takes very little for me to notice it - it must therefore be ear damage on a level that I didnt have before.
At the moment, any idea of ever possibly returning to sound engineering is completely out of the window - I wouldn’t be able to do more than about 15 minutes of a session before it got too much. I cant ever focus on making music in my own studio, let alone going to a different one.
Oh well, I’ll just have to wait and see what the doctor says tomorrow and if there is any possibility of getting further professional help.
My advice: get some ear plugs [I have quality custom made ones from Sensorcom ] and use them!
Tags: custom ear plugs, ear plugs, Hyperacusis, misophonia, Pawel Jastreboff, sensorcom, sensorcom.com, tinnitus, tinnitus retraining therapy
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